So my boyfriend gets court papers served to him today at school. Any time uniformed officials with badges show up and ask for someone by name is scary enough. When it’s your kid’s mom trying to have the court take away the ONE NIGHT you get with your 5 year old son each week, it can be much scarier. Why is she so upset? Because he filed for joint custody. Nothing new, nothing different than what he has now, just filed the papers to put it in writing.
I’ve never understood the custody battles — the one who suffers the most is the child(ren). Parents (and a lot of the time, their parents) seem to want “ownership” of their child. Not to make sure the kid is bathed, clothed, fed, loved and given medical care, but to make sure that they, the parent, is always in control of the situation. Which, in some instances, could be absolutely necessary. But when the child’s father is constantly being threatened with not being allowed to see his child, when he otherwise is a good dad, it’s inevitably going to put strain on the relationship and thus harm the child.
I don’t have kids of my own. But, if I did, I sure as shit would make sure their dad(s) were individuals I could stand. Why on earth would I allow a baby to grow inside me if I didn’t know or trust its other half? I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t put the CHILD through that. And those who do are just SELFISH little girls who are looking for the love the couldn’t get from some dude. And guess what? Having his kid isn’t gonna help either. Just saying.